Sunday, November 22

A Break From Paper Writing

A new blog post!  Crazy, I know...but this one has to do a little with procrastinating about a paper I am working on.

I am in a course called, "Christian Heresies" and it is absolutely wonderful!  Not growing up having any knowledge of church history - due to being a Baptist and never really talking about any of this in church (just stating a reality), I am learning so much about where the "church" has come from and I have lots of opinions about this, not that this is the place to share them, but I'm trying to take a break, if you will, from my paper.

I would just like to say that I feel like somewhat of a skeptic about Constantine.  I'm talking about my paper, may not want to read any more (if anyone does read this), because I just have to free write, and then get back to my "formal" writing for the it goes:

Maybe I'm right on the money, but more than likely, I'm being crazy skeptical and judgemental about poor Constantine, the Great.  I've decided that he was kind of in the business of Christianity for the political power that he saw it bringing him.  I know some believe that he actually converted to Christianity, and maybe he did, I don't know...but I have a hard time believing that he saw a vision of a Chi Rho, put it on the shield or whatever of his soldiers, won the battle, THEN decided to convert to Christianity, and it was all genuine...(like I said, the probability of this being judgemental is great).  The poor Emperor got shysted out of being emperor in the first place, then eventually became emperor, and in that day, whoever won the battles in the name of whatever 'god' they were fighting for was the 'god' that was like I said, I think it was all a political maneuver on his part...especially all the council of nicea business...

Eusebius:  Here's my Creed, see, it works!
Constantine: Sounds great, let's do that!

COUNCIL: NO!  What are you thinking?  It's too broad, even Arius could agree! [gasps of horror]

Constantine: Oh...well, then....Ossius, how about you go talk to Arius and Alexander and get them to be friends again
Ossius: Okay, I guess I could do that, what are they fighting about, again?
Constantine: idk...just go moderate, see you soon!
Ossius: peace, bro!

Ossius: Hey, Arius, Alex, why can't we all just get along?  [campaigns for hugs]
Arius: Alex sucks, we could never get along!
Alex: Yeah, I will never agree with Arius.  I'm rubber, he's glue, whatever bounces off of me sticks to him! [sticks tongue out]
Ossius: Oh, well, I didn't really know what was going on anyway, so...coo!  Hasta la vista!

Constantine: Crap, Ossius couldn't help...I guess I better call a council...

COUNCIL: We hate Arius, let's just make something that says EVERYTHING opposite of what Arius thinks, then we can call that orthodoxy!
COUNCIL (In unison, minus several members): SWEET!

COUNCIL (above stated, several members): So....Constantine, we don't really agree with this creed, can we have more time to think on it?
Constantine: Freakin' idiots - NO! I need everyone to be happy and get along! Sign the dotted line for goodness's sake and get on with it, it's not the end of the world! I'll excommunicate you if you don't!
COUNCIL (above states, several members): [scared and hesitant] ...okay

Constantine: Sweet, unity!  Now everything will be grand, the Christian God will bless my empire and I'll die rich and prosperous!

{end scene}

If only I could see Constantine as genuine...but it's a little difficult.  I think it was nice of him to create the Edict of Milan with Licinius...but I just don't know about this whole..."I'm gonna make Christianity the religion of the Empire and everyone has to follow it how I want it to be run, or else they are heretics! Burn 'em all...the heretics that is"....I guess I don't see that...

Anyway, now that I was able to express the cartoonish scenario going on in my head, I must get back to said paper....

(Don't hate me because I'm opinionated - I absolutely could be wrong...that's why it's an opinion...)

Peace, bros!

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